Faith/Spirituality Forum: People Who Hate People
People Who Hate People QUESTION from Connie on April 6, 2003 I work with a woman who I have overheard say 3 times that she hates people.
As a person who loves people, I can not understand how anyone can hate people.
This woman has always ignored me and never shown any civil or kind behavior towards me, though I have never done anything to her. I have been told she puts me down behind my back and all I do is pray for her and continue to be kind and civil to her.
She is in a second marriage with 3 children and seems emotionally immature to me.
How can people say they hate people in general? What makes a person become that way? Doesn't their hatred of all people ultimately include hatred of themselves, since they are members of the human race?
Is her hatred merely a reflection of her self- hatred? Do they hate others because they see their own weaknesses and faults reflected back at them in others?
I worry what her children may become if they are being raised by a mother who hates people, and what her husband must endure knowing she hates people.
I talked with our office manager at work about her and they told me they can't change her personality, she does her job efficiently so we just have to put up with her rudeness and unkindness.
It is hard to work with someone who looks at you only with frowns and meanness and condescending (put-down) behavior.
How does a christian counter such behavior, in addition to praying for them and being kind to them?
Hatred is a strong word which I try not to include in my vocabulary. People who use the word hate when referring to themselves I believe are very emotional people with strong feelings. Perhaps they are confusing hatred with dislike?
Hate is the opposite of love, and a person filled with true hatred must be under control of Satan, am I right?
ANSWER by John-Paul Ignatius, OLSM on April 8, 2003 Dear Connie:
Certainly it is difficult to be around a hateful person. Yes, hateful people, I believe, do hate themselves. They may be experiencing some deep hurt from their past that is unresolved.
In any event, we must remember that we cannot change anyone. We must love everyone no matter how obnoxious they are.
As a Christian our duty toward such a person is to love them unconditionally, model for them the best of Christian charity, do not respond to their hate, but respond kindly (but we do not have to be a door mat for them, if course).
Then pray for them and their family. Offer them up to God that He will heal the hurts or whatever it is that is causing this person to be hateful. Pray, Pray, Pray. And be a model Christian of Christian charity toward her.
Back to Index Page